To Love Like a Sungod !

You have most probably heard of John Gray's book Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.  Well the Mars / Venus analogy, taken from classical Roman mythology is very useful but in Britain and Western Europe we have an even older tradition.  In our own native mythology the feminine, birth giving, nurturing principal is represented by Mother Earth and the masculine, powerful, energising, impregnation principle is represented by the Sun.  I will show you why this is important to you, in your own 21st century life, in a moment.

In pre-Copernican times, when the earth was believed to be at the centre of the solar system, even the universe, this model gave rise to a largely matriarchal society.  This was probably useful then because the human population needed building up and the birth-givers took the major roll in this.  Today when over population, especially in the rich countries is fuelling runaway global warming, the roll of the birth-givers is less important.  And, thanks to Mr. Copernicus, we now know that the Sun is at the centre of the Solar System.  Man, not woman, is at the heart of things, providing the power to literally "make the world go around".

The ancients did not just pick on these analogies at random.  They understood that the analogies really do work well in explaining the natures of men and women.   For a long time I have realised that my own true nature is sun-like.  Like the Sun, I have so much love to give, to radiate out.  And like the Sun I give it freely to any woman (within reason) who comes close enough to be warmed and empowered by it.  This is what it means to love like a sun god, to love like Apollo in the Greek tradition or Bellenos in our own native tradition. 

Unfortunately in pre-Copernican times, it was thought that the Sungod began to die soon after the Summer Solstice and was re-born at Yule (the Winter Solstice). This was the original meaning of the Child of Promise who is bourn at Yule / Christmas. In these old traditions (and in some neo-Pagan traditions which follow the old ways blindly) they pray for the Sungod to return to them and to impregnate the Earth Mother that the earth may be fruitful once again.  In neo-Pagan groups that call themselves Post-Copernican Pagans, they acknowledge the ever present Sungod, and realise that the Earth Mother, having conceived, given birth and raised her children (all life on earth), now needs to rest.  So she turns her face from our Ever-loving Sungod for a time but this brings no sadness, just happiness for the joy they have shared.  Obviously nobody thinks there stories are literally true but don't these beautiful traditions resonate deeply about the relationships between men and women?

The sun does not care which planets come close and which keep their distance.  Mercury and Venus actually come too close and get scorched.  Earth and possibly Mars come just about close enough.  It is thought that some environmental disaster may have made Mars the barren place it is today but that once it may have been more Earth-like.  Whether it ever supported life or not we do not yet know but it almost certainly would have been capable of supporting life once.  The other planets beyond Mars are too distant for the ever loving Sungod to support live.  The only possible exception to this is Europa, one of Jupiter's moons.  It has been speculated that it may have subterranean seas warm enough to support life.  However Europa is warmed by geothermal activity due the strong magnetic pull from Jupiter.  It is not warmed by the sun.

And most men are not too fussed which women want him and which don't, as long as enough do.  And aren't women just as fickle as men are constant?  They have their monthly cycles and longer term cycles too.  They don't want to make love with you for a while after the birth of a child.  Of course not.  It is an exhausting process.  So they turn their face from you for a while so they can rest.  See the parallel? 

Where did our modern ideas of the nuclear family come from?  It comes from millions of years of evolution.  Look at the world of all the animals and birds who share this bountiful planet with us.  They also have been evolving for millions of years and they have come up with a range of strategies which work for them.  Some species pair for life, others only pair for one season.  In some species the females care for the young alone, in others both parents share the work.  In a few species the male alone brings up the kids and in some other species no one looks after the kids, they are born fully able to look after themselves. With some species like lions and deer, the dominant male holds a harem of females and keeps them all to himself.  Chimpanzees are a lot more promiscuous and screw anything that moves, they don't seem to care much about which sex they are screwing either. There is nothing sacrosanct about any one of these systems.  If it works for you, do it.

Biologically the purpose of sex is to reproduce, to get YOUR genes into the genes pool.  But to pass your genetic material on to generation after generation in perpetuity, getting a female pregnant is not enough.  You have to make sure that your child gets born and that that child gets to grow up and have children of his own.  That way, and that way only, do your genes survive.  It makes not difference that we no longer need lots of children.  All through our long evolution we did, and our brains are now hard wired to behave that way.

So what is the best strategy for having lots of grandchildren?  Well the answer to that question rather depends on whether you are a boy or a girl.  If you are a girl you don't want to play the numbers game.  You don't want to get pregnant every year in the hope that one or two kids will survive.  Some species do it that way but for humans, pregnancy and child birth is an exhausting process.  It takes a lot out of women, so they opt for a more cunning strategy  Firstly they need to get the best possible genetic material. They instinctively want to breed with the top dog, the alpha male.  Obviously if they look like the back of a bus they will have to make do with a beta male.  Next they need to persuade (con) said alpha male into sticking around after copulation.  They need him to provided lavishly for the children to give them the best start in life.  This strategy is good in theory but in practice may not work.  Our randy alpha male, once having copulated, will likely be on the search for pastures new.  If that happens she will then quickly find a nice, kind, beta male, give him the ride of his life, insist that alpha male's children are really his and get him to stick around and provide for them.  

So what is the best strategy for a man to have lots of grandchildren?  That's easy.  Screw his f**king dick off.  He dose not have to carry the children for nine months and, if he is smart, he won't have to stick around and provide for them either.  Ok, what I am describing here are our biological needs.  Hopefully, as modern, civilised people, both the males and the females will modify these strategies in the light of what is fair and decent.  But you get the point.  The main reason why men are promiscuous is that evolution has designed us that way.  The main reason why women are promiscuous is that they have picked a compromise mate, a nice guy who will stick around, and they are board with him.

Some men will try to deny their true natures but that way lies frustration and madness.  We are hard wired by evolution to love like a Sun God.  The only problem with this strategy is that it only works for high status males.  Beta males are better off finding a wife / mother to care for them.  However, even if you where not born alpha material, there is still hope. 

As I said in the last article, the difference with we humans is that we are the only species who can lie.  Yes we can lie about our status, we can pretend to be an alpha male.  And do you know what?  If we keep up the pretence long enough we actually BECOME an alpha male.  What about that?  I leant how to do that by a brilliant guy who as been there, done that and got the T-shirt.  John Alexander started out just like you and me, a pathetic love sick puppy.  Now he has women virtually begging him for it.  You too can learn his method.  Find out more: http://www.youngmansmanual.com/John.htm   Its not just about getting more sex, you can build brilliant, long term relationships this way too - on your own terms.  

You will also find a lot of great stuff by dating guru Mike Pilinski on his website: http://www.youngmansmanual.com/Mike.htm 

Have a great life, you deserve it!

Jack Cox